Wake Windows or Schedules?
As adults with set work times, school pick-ups, and appointments, we tend to yearn for set schedules, but do set schedules really make sense when it comes to pediatric sleep? A schedule can be a good tool for understanding what your child’s day could look like, based on developmentally appropriate wake windows, but it’s important to be flexible with your schedule, understanding that our kids are not robots, and not every day is going to look the same. When we force a schedule sometimes we create more of a bedtime battle for ourselves by asking an undertired or overtired child to fall asleep easily, when they just won’t be able to. Let’s look a little closer at how wake windows work, and how you can use them to optimize your child’s sleep.
What is a Wake Window?
A wake window is the amount of time that your child is developmentally able to stay awake. Wake windows start really small (as little as 20 minutes for a premature infant, and 45-60 minutes for a newborn) and gradually increase over the first few years of your child’s life (for example your three your old has a wake window of 6-7 hours). Wake windows are based on averages, so you can expect some variation, which is why it’s important to spend some time observing your child and learning how they cue their tiredness.
What is a Sleep Gate?
When a child is put down for a nap or bedtime as their natural wake window is closing, and there is adequate sleep pressure (meaning they’ve spent enough total time awake to be sleepy), they should fall asleep without much fuss, and within about 15 minutes. When you get the sleep pressure and the wake window just right, this is called a sleep gate!
Common Mistakes when using Wake Windows
Wake windows are often mishandled in the sleep world, and therefore can get a bad rap, but if you get them right, it makes the job of helping your child get to sleep so much easier! Here are some common mistakes to avoid
Using too large a wake window (I find parents often transition to a longer wake window too soon! Anytime they see troubles come up with naps they assume it's time to lengthen the wake window or lose a nap, which isn’t necessarily the case. It could be a regression, or maybe if you missed some sleepy cues and your baby is actually overtired
Wake windows are calculated based on when the baby was taken out of their crib, rather than when the baby actually woke up (if you are practicing some of the more common nap training techniques, you have probably been told to start your wake window when you take baby out of crib, instead of using actually sleep time)
Wake windows are used “as is”, without the parents getting curious about their own child’s sleep cues and daily patterns. Remember the windows are averages. You should log your child’s sleep for several days to determine what window is best for them. Are they consistently getting fussy before you actually put them down for a nap (they probably need a smaller window), are they taking longer than 15 minutes to fall asleep on a regular basis (they probably need a larger window)
How to Make the Most out of Wake Windows
Use the shortest wake window in the morning, and the longest in the stretch right before bed
Once your child gets down to one nap per day, use the longest wake window in the morning, and reserve the shorter one for the stretch right before bed
Be a little flexible! If your child is sick, or had a rough night, you’ll probably want to shorten their windows for that day. If you have to schedule their nap around an immovable appointment for the day, understand that you may need to provide more support for that nap if a wake window is pushed, or get creative and plan for a nap on the go
Always let your baby lead the way with their patterns to determine when to stretch the window. Just because your child turned 7 months on the calendar, doesn’t necessarily mean they are ready to move from 6 month wake windows to 7 month ones, let them show you based on their patterns of getting to sleep over the course of about a week.
Start your day (as far as wake windows are concerned) at 6am, even if your baby wakes up earlier.
Why I Personally Prefer Wake Windows Over Schedules
Wake windows are more realistic and meet babies where they are developmentally. They make our job as parents easier, because babies are ready to fall asleep when we honor their wake windows, rather than trying to force them to sleep when they are over or under tired. Rather than a rigid schedule, wake windows allow some flexibility for dealing with things like illness, a short nap that day, a late start, etc. I know it is super tempting to print out a schedule, put it on your fridge, and try to live and die by that schedule, but if you get a knot of dread in your throat every time it's time to enforce naptime, you probably need some wake windows in your life! Does that mean you can’t have a schedule? Not really ( I even provide sample/ideal schedules in my packages) , you can have an ideal schedule based on appropriate wake windows, you just have to understand that you probably aren’t going to hit that exact schedule every single day. The good news is, when we get wake windows right, and are consistent in using them, you will likely see a natural schedule start to form.
If all of this has your head totally spinning, book a free consultation! We can talk about your sleep challenges, ideal wake windows, and ideal routines for your child. This can all get pretty confusing, especially when you yourself are tired; but you don’t have to figure it all out on your own! Schedule now at https://calendly.com/slumberbunnies/discoverycall
